The Death of Passion

Passion and Sunk-cost bias

Back in 2015, six years ago, I was a huge car enthusiast. I loved everything about them. I was a fanatic car-spotter. Soon I started sketching them as well. I was watching a shit load of tutorial videos on car sketching. My study table was piled up with sketchbooks and, my hands were always inked blue. The back covers of all my notebooks were tattooed with car sketches.

I even found my way into a very private WhatsApp group of professional car designers, met one guy to mentor me. It was a great time of my life.

Then came 2017, my first year of graduation. I was still very motivated about car designing as my career choice. I had it all figured out, a list of colleges for my Masters, their admission criteria, the entrance exams. I knew everything there was to know about car designing, not from a technical standpoint but academically.

I pasted a yellow sticky note on the wall supporting my table that said: “Lamborghini won’t hire you for your excuses.” Now that I think about it, it sounds childish, but at that time my ultimate goal was to work in Lamborghini. I was very passionate about it.

Unfortunately, things didn’t go the way I thought they will. I started to lose my interest in sketching. I had to force myself to even sit to draw. I could feel that I was losing my drive. I developed a sense of disgust about it because it made me feel like a fraud who robbed himself.

However, I denied that thought and struggled with it for a year or so. Very soon I realized that my passion for sketching is dead and there is nothing I can do about it. So I ventured along other journeys in my life that were equally interesting with their unique set of problems.

I started questioning my self-worth at that time. I felt like a coward who couldn’t keep up with his dreams. But soon my new ventures suppressed those negative thoughts. Though, it was still there in the back of my brain, constantly entering the parts of my conscious mind to remind me of my shortcomings. After a while, I learned a lesson that significantly changed my perception about my decision of leaving sketching. I felt relieved.

Framework of Passion

After I left sketching, I partnered with my colleague to start a startup. It allowed me to interact with a lot of smart people. They made me realize that if you don’t like to do something don’t do it. This idea sounds very obvious, but when we devote our time and effort to something it creates a sunk-cost bias and we forget why we started doing that thing— for the joy it brought to us.

Related: Nine Cognitive Biases That Hijack Your Decision-Making

The answer is simple—don’t do it if you are not having fun. But it gets a little more complicated than that.

Activation Energy and Passion

One thing to keep in mind, that is very important, is that you always need an initial push to do something, a small kick to make the engine warm. When you are curled up on your beanbag snugly watching your favorite TV show, it will take some effort to get up and do something. Don’t doubt your passion because you need some activation energy to get started. It is natural. Your passion is still alive, don’t worry. Humans are designed to stay in their comfort zone, and we always struggle to get out of it.

Recommended Reading: From Comfort Zone to Performance Management

I am highlighting this point because I don’t want self-doubt to creep into your passion. Self-doubt can have very negative effects on your performance. You will start feeling like an imposter, a misfit for the task at hand.

The idea that you will always be motivated to do the thing you are passionate about is garbage. Your self-help gurus are lying about it. If that was the case they would never go on vacations, and yet that’s all you see on their Instagram profile.

It’s Dead Now…

While it’s okay to push yourself to initiate the things you are passionate about, it’s a red flag if you have to do the same during the process. If it bores you, you probably need to reconsider whether it deserves your attention or not.

Persist for a while, but if you feel the same way over a period of time it’s time to bury the body of your passion. You will feel bad because you have invested your time and effort in it, the same sunk cost bias story all-over again. You will have to acknowledge its death, and the earlier you do that, the less painful it would be.

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I appreciate your patience and dedication to read this essay. I am glad that you made it to the end. I hope you learned something that will help you to avoid sunk-cost bias while following your passion.

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